I am not alone

I am not alone

It might feel that way

Invisible, insidious

Pain

Wraps its disease

Around everyone

At one time or another,

Tying us all in knots.

What would I do

At the top of a cliff

Faced with nothing

But a promise of ending

One step removed.

The twist of emotions

Curled tightly around my heart,

With the telltale stink

Of dead Lilacs,

Taking the breath away.

Did you climb from the bath

Was it an end or a start

Facing oblivion

With empty eye sockets

What monsters are we

To expect more from ourselves

Than we can give.

As the ground falls away

And the end rushes up

Is that when it stops?

Will I grow

Closer to god

As the righteous believe

When they tug on their guilt

Wear it like a body stocking

And play with themselves

For fear of letting go

A little bit of Tommyrot

With which to beat us.

As fat little lies

Drip out of the asinine

Sermons of the pious

Who believe they will

Be as worthy

As the dearly departed

With every Hail Mary.

You were never a coward

So much braver then than I.

There is nothing worth waiting for

But the door is still closed.

I keep it double-locked

Just in case

Of mistakes.

One day it will open

All by itself

Decisions made easy

Isn’t that what we all hope

Will happen

In the end.